Children are facing more pressure nowadys from academic, social and commrcial perspectives. What are the causes of these pressures and what measures should be taken to reduce these pressures?

The young generation these days are struggling to meet the expectation of family and
society
. They are judged based on the academic, social and commercial rating scales in the community. Influence from social
media
and global-level competition is seen to be the main reason leading to
this
issue. I will be explaining the causes of
this
phenomenon and provide some measures to reduce the effects. The current generation is struggling to keep a high profile on social
media
and compete with status labels within the community. For these people believe education from
highl
Correct your spelling
highly
high
ranked international universities and obtaining higher degrees are essential, and families force their children in attaining
such
degrees. To exemplify, a child who has a passion for arts is forced to do a science degree to maintain a reputation regardless of his dreams and wishes. Another main reason is competition at global levels. Kids these days not only compete with students from their school or even country but they are now expected to meet international standards in education and co-curricular activities. Youngster'syoungster these days are brought up with the constant pressure of commercial perspectives.
For instance
, agriculture and skilled labour are not seen as high-status careers
due to
the commercialisation of work. Meanwhile, jobs
such
as engineering, computer and medical fields are seen as a fancy highly recognised professions and other jobs are often degraded for commercial benefits. Parents and
society
have to be mindful of the constant constraint they put on young people and give them chance to live their life, regardless of social pressure. Government and schools have to educate parents on how these social expectations impact children's mental health and well-being.
In addition
, commercial advertisements which glorify certain jobs and degrade other professions should be banned and strict restrictions on social
media
usage should be implemented.
Overall
, children should not be forced to meet the expectation of public platforms and
society
, they have to be encouraged to follow their hearts. For
this
, parents and
society
have to be educated and government should bring strict policies restricting social
media
's flooding
such
biases.
Submitted by liyajayas on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Read more in the eBook

The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »

* free ebook for Premium users

What to do next:
Look at other essays: