The graph below shows the different home activities among young children in four different countries.

#home #activities #children #four #countries

In given

Change preposition

Given

show examples

bar graph gives data about the different home

activites

Correct your spelling

activities

among young children in

four

different

countries

.There are

four

categories of home

activites

Correct your spelling

activities

.They are

compuer

Correct your spelling

computer

games

,reading,

board

games

and watching

. Looking at the graph as a whole,playing computer

games

was the most population among young children

then

reading was the lowest

activities

Fix the agreement mistake

activity

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in all

countries

. In detail,playing computer

games

proportion

more than 40% in

four

countries

,and the

proportion

of computer

games

and reading is 50% different in Nigeria.

Also

watching

Correct article usage

the watching

show examples

rate

Change preposition

show examples

four

Correct article usage

the four

show examples

countries

remained constant at 30%.

Malaysia

Change noun form

Malaysia's

show examples

proportion

of every

other than reading are

proportion

over than 20%.

The

Change preposition

In the

show examples

four

countries

are

proportion

in older of

compuer

Correct your spelling

computer

games

whatching

Correct your spelling

watching

board

games

and reading,

then

as you can see,in Malaysia and Nigeria

proportion

Correct article usage

the proportion

show examples

increaseing

Correct your spelling

increased

same

Change the article

the same

show examples

rise in older

Change preposition

apply

show examples

reading,

board

games

and watching

Submitted by hatsudaya706 on Sat Apr 08 2023

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Vocabulary: Rephrase your introduction. Words match: 67%.

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Vocabulary: Replace the words four, countries, games, board, tv, proportion with synonyms.

▼

Vocabulary: The word "graph" was used 2 times.

▼

Vocabulary: The word "give" was used 2 times.

▼

Vocabulary: The word "proportion" was used 6 times.

▼

Vocabulary: The word "remained" was used 2 times.

▼

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2Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
6Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
20Mistakes

3 paragraphs

151 words

6.50

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Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

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Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes

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Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

Check your writing for errors

Task Achievement: 9.0

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Use an appropriate tone

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The graph below shows the different home activities among young children in four different countries.

Many people believe that women make better parents than men and that this is why they have the greater role in raising children in most societies.Others claim that men are just as good as women at parenting. Write an essay expressing your point of view.

More people will work from home and more student will study at home if computer technology becomes cheap and accessible. What will be the advantage and disadvantage if this happen?

Feedback and evaluation are necessary aspects of school and work, but many people dislike being evaluated. What are the causes of this problem? How could it be solved?

Some people think that teacher should be responsible for teaching students to judge what is right and wrong so that they can behave well. Others say that teachers should only teach students academic subjects. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Some believe that the Olympic games help bring people from different nations together, while others claim that holding the Olympics wastes money which could be used for important issues. Discuss both sides and give your own opinion.