The pie chart below shows the main reasons why agricultural land become lesson productive. The table shows how these causes affected three regions of the world during the 1990s.
The
pie
graph displays the principal causes
why
farming land deteriorates Change preposition
of why
while
the table
illustrates how three regions of the planet were affected by these factors in the 1990s.
As you can see all I have done is change the words in the questions using synonyms and then
connected them using the word ‘while
’.
We can clearly see from the pie
chart that there are three primary causes
of farmland degradation, and over-grazing is the major one. The table
shows that Europe had a far higher percentage of unproductive land compared to the other two regions in this
time period.
For this
paragraph
I have picked out the main features from each graph and Add a comma
,paragraph
wrote
them in a general way. Notice that I have not included any numbers. We will support our ideas with Wrong verb form
written
Add an article
a number
the number
number
in the next two paragraphs. Fix the agreement mistake
numbers
Also
, notice that I am using the present simple for the pie
chart because there is no date and the past tense for the table
because it was in the 1990s.
The pie
chart represents four causes
, with over-grazing representing the biggest proportion at just over a third. Widespread clearing of trees and the over-use of crops constitute nearly one third
and just over a quarter respectively.
Here I have varied my language by using synonyms for the Add a hyphen
one-third
causes
and proportions and fractions for the data.
The table
shows that nearly one quarter
of Europe’s entire surface had fallen victim to degeneration. Only a small proportion of North America’s total land became less productive at 5% and Oceania was marginally higher with a value of 13%.Add a hyphen
one-quarter
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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "while".
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Basic structure: Use less body paragraphs.
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Common mistake: Your writing should be 150-250 words.
Vocabulary: Replace the words pie, causes, table with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "undefined" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: The word "chart" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "table" was used 4 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "graph" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "shows" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "proportion" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "nearly" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "just over" was used 2 times.
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