IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 6.5

While studying abroad provides an opportunity to broaden one’s experience, as also present the danger of letting influence from the host culture. How far do you agree or disagree with this statement?

#opportunity #one’s #danger #influence #host #culture
In recent years,the search
of
Change preposition
for
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 greener pastures has been a pandemic
trends
Correct the article-noun agreement
trend
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.
Thus
,
people
tends
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tend
show examples
 to travel to
the
Remove the article
apply
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another country to acquire more knowledge and get exposed to different opportunities. Some
people
 argue that
this
 could have an impact
in
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on
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one
's
culture
. I strongly disagree with
this
 statement.
Firstly
, the value of
one
 ethnic group plays an important role.
Therefore
, if
people
 value their traditions, there won'
t
 be any amount of pressure from other
society
Fix the agreement mistake
societies
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 that can
made
Change the verb form
make
be made
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 them deviate.
For instance
, a family friend travelled to India for schooling, reaching there,she received a cultural shock but she adapted to their system and after 5years of studying she came back and continue her normal life. There is
saying
Correct article usage
a saying
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 that when you are in
the
Correct article usage
apply
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Rome, you
behaves
Change the verb form
behave
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 like Romans. She respected their
culture
 and follows their traditions during the period of her stay but that didn'
t
 change her beliefs about her customs.
Furthermore
, there are good opportunities in traveling outside
one
 geographical location but the influence of
culture
 is
base
Wrong verb form
based
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 on personality.
In other words
, it is if an individual
decide
Change the verb form
decides
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 to let other
culture
Change the wording
cultures
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have
Unnecessary verb
apply
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influence him because most countries won'
t
forced
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force
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 you in accepting their beliefs and customs but
one
have
Change the verb form
has
show examples
 to respect
it
Correct pronoun usage
them
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 whilst they live there.
For example
,
one
 who
traveled
Change the spelling
travelled
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 may have a change in dialect due to constant communication or dressing due to change in weather but their traditions won'
t
 be forced upon
because
Correct pronoun usage
them because
show examples
 everyone
have
Change the verb form
has
show examples
 their own belief. To sum up,
traveling
Change the spelling
travelling
show examples
 to other countries have
giving
Wrong verb form
given
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people
 chances to gain different skills as well as opportunities they want to explore.
However
,
one
have
Change the verb form
has
show examples
 the choice to choose if they will be influenced
with
Change preposition
by
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 another
culture
 or not.
Submitted by enaughetheresa on

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