The charts below show the average percentages in typical meals of three types of nutrients, all of which may be unhealthy if eaten too much.

The charts below show the average percentages in typical meals of three types of nutrients, all of which may be unhealthy if eaten too much.
The pie charts illustrate the proportion of some nutrient categories in regular meals in the USA.
Overall
,
while
the
percentage
of
sodium
and saturated fat occupies a main part,
in
Change preposition
of
show examples
dinner,
the
Correct article usage
a
show examples
high rate of
sugar
is contained in snacks.
Besides
,
breakfast
, and
lunch
show noticeably less
percentage
of these unhealthy substances.
Whereas
the rate of
sodium
and saturated fat
account
Change the verb form
accounts
show examples
for more than two-fifths and more than a
third
respectively, the
percentage
of added
sugar
in
this
main meal is just over a fifth.
In addition
,
sub meals
Add a hyphen
sub-meals
show examples
such
as snacks contain a considerable
percentage
of unhealthy substances
that is
over two-fifths of added
sugar
, more than a fifth of saturated fat and more than a minority of
sodium
.
In contrast
,
breakfast
and
lunch
witness a minimal number of unhealthy substances. The pie charts show→ demonstrate/ depict/ illustrate that
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
Americans consume only 14% of
sodium
at
breakfast
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
and
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
double
percentage
of
this
substance at
lunch
.
Besides
, the saturated fat and added
sugar
share the same amount at 16% at
breakfast
,
while
these proportions are 26% and 19% at
lunch
respectively.
Submitted by khanh3802 on

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "besides, while".
Vocabulary: Replace the words percentage, sodium, sugar, breakfast, lunch with synonyms.
Vocabulary: The word "charts" was used 2 times.
Vocabulary: The word "illustrate" was used 2 times.
Vocabulary: The word "show" was used 2 times.
Vocabulary: The word "percentage" was used 5 times.
Vocabulary: The word "proportion" was used 2 times.
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