IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 6.5

The charts below show the percentage of water used for different purposes in six areas of the world. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant

The charts below show the percentage of water used for different purposes in six areas of the world. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant
#show #percentage #water #purposes #six #areas #world #summarise #information #features #comparisons
The given pie charts illustrate the consumption of
water
 for industrial, agricultural, and domestic purposes by six different regions of the world.
Overall
, in almost all
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
areas, the
water
 is mostly consumed in
agriculture
 except in North America and Europe, where
industries
 use the maximum amount of
water
.
Firstly
, in the three given areas namely, South America, Africa, and Central Asia the maximum
water
 usage which is more than
one
Add a hyphen
one-third
show examples
third
is
Change the verb form
are
show examples
 by
agriculture
Correct article usage
the agriculture
show examples
field
, followed by
industries
 and
then
 domestic
field
; In those areas, the proportion of
water
 consumed in
agriculture
 is 71%, 84%, and 88%,
while
 in the household is 19%, 9% and 7% respectively.
Additionally
, the
water
 consumption by
industries
 in those three regions is 10%, 7% and 5% respectively. Interestingly, in Southeast Asia, the trends are similar in terms of
water
 used for agricultural purposes because it still remains the most
water
-consuming
field
 among all three of them
by
Change preposition
apply
show examples
using 81% of
water
.
However
, the
second
 place is taken by
industrial
Correct article usage
the industrial
show examples
field
, which uses 12% of
water
 and the least ratio of
water
 is consumed for domestic purposes which
is
Change the verb form
are
show examples
 7%.
On the other hand
, the proportion of
water
 consumption is nearly the same in North America and Europe, where the maximum percentage of
water
that is
 48% and 53% is used in
industries
, followed by
agriculture
 which is 39% and 32% and the least
that is
 just 13% and 15% respectively is used for domestic purpose.
Submitted by johaljassi10 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "that is".
▼
Vocabulary: Replace the words water, agriculture, industries, field with synonyms.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "give" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "proportion" was used 2 times.
▼
What to do next:
Look at other essays: