Many believe that retirement age is strict to 65 years old , which is unfair. To what extent you agree or disagree ?

It is unfair to set a
retirement
age like 65 years old with ignoring to the kind of profession or occupation that people
work
. I believe we have to consider that according to the type of
work
, we could determine who can deserve an early
retirement
than other. Some professions need a physical ability to
work
under pressure and tension which is much more difficult
on
Suggestion
for
the old aged workers than on their younger colleagues, that make them under risk of injuries and health drawbacks as their bodies cannot fit or withstand all of that effort needed.
For example
, some workers need a good pension to support their families financially like their daughters’ marriage,
therefore
they need to retire
earlier
Suggestion
early
to take the pension earlier.
Moreover
, some workers have serious chronic diseases like diabetes, hypertension and other cardiovascular disorders that make them need a usual and special care at home,
otherwise
it will be a high risk of strokes and heart failures that make their health is under dangerous and hard to continue at
work
.
On the other hand
, some professions need the experience more than the physical
work load
work that a person is expected to do in a specified time
workload
.
Such
as the consultancy in a bank or any investment entity. It needs the employees to be more expert and
skillful
having or showing knowledge and skill and aptitude
skilful
than the hard working. Resulting that the elder employees in the company are more proficient and valuable than others, which make the employers put
retirement
age to be older than other professions. As the company will need their knowledge and experience in the future. In conclusion, I
wholehearted
Suggestion
wholeheartedly
agree that some workers deserve earlier
retirement according
Accept comma addition
retirement, according
to the kind of
work load
work that a person is expected to do in a specified time
workload
and their family needs. Rather than the others who
work
in companies need their experience that gained all over that age, they deserve high wages and high respect.

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    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
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    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
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    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
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